Christians Painting Rosy Pictures Are A Disservice To Others

Many Christians say their lives are an open book, when the truth is, they hide the hurts, the pains, the mistakes and the missteps of their lives from view. Recently an acquaintance complained that elder Christians she had gone to for help were suffering from the same problems she had gone to them for help with. She felt as though they should be "beyond" those problems since they had been saved for some time. In my own life, I've had other Christians chastise me because I speak about my problems dealing with pain, loneliness, depression and hurt. I should be "above" those things, by now, according to them.

I truly do try to live my life completely open for any and all to see what it is I'm going through: the joys, the glories, the victories, the pain, the loss and the heartaches, as well. It isn't helpful to young Christians to view elder Christians as having perfected living to the point that we don't have the same problems they have. When they have that perception, they become disillusioned and disappointed as the young woman I mentioned earlier because they learn that we, too, are human. When the preacher and his wife present themselves to the congregation as having a perfect marriage in which they never have disagreements or anger they do a disservice to their congregation, as well as presenting a lie to the fold. No one has the perfect marriage without any problems. A marriage without disagreements is one in which the partners don't care about the other any longer and each is living their own life.

My grandparents were married for 52 years and I would say they had a great, solid marriage. Yet, they still had arguments; even heated arguments. And sometimes those arguments were over very trivial matters. But they chose to love one another and work through their problems and differences rather than surrender to the difficulties and hardships and go their separate ways. Many a young couple today could stand to study a marriage like my grandparents had instead of looking at the marriages of many pastors of many churches in this country because those pastors have put up a false facade of perfection.

What's truly sad is that as Christians we somehow think because we've been saved for 30+ years, we have to put up a front of having overcome all the stumbling blocks and hardships, trials and tribulations. In fact, we're harming the younger generations by doing thus because when they face those same hardships they somehow feel they've failed because they didn't measure up to the standard we've set before them. Jesus was truly our example for this: He was the living, incarnate God in the flesh, yet He faced temptations and trials. He even told us we would always face those trials and tribulations, disappointments and struggles, but that we should always hold on to our faith because He would always be with us.

And so, I will continue to share when I'm going through a hard time; I will continue to praise when I'm going through a glory time, and through it all I will give all the glory and praise to Christ Jesus, for He is my source, strength and sustenance. And maybe, just maybe, some younger Christian will look at my life and know that they're not failing when they go through the hard times, as well.